Protect Your Children and Teenagers from Sexual Abusers!
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The more parents know, the better they can protect their children
Read more at One With Courage.

 

A Predator's Toolkit
Most "professional pedophiles" have turned molestation into a fine science. They are precise in their plans and use well tested lures and traps to get kids in a place where they can be molested. The following a "profile of seduction", an overview of how a predator works.

LURES

1. Drugs (Voluntary and involuntary)

2. Alcohol (To lower the victim's inhibitions and make them confused and vulnerable)

3. Pornography (Printed and video, to lower the sexual inhibitions and arouse the victim)

4. Music, video games, etc.
The predator is current on music trends, video games, movies, etc. and their homes often look like a kid's paradise.

5. Prestige & Status.
To a boy or teen, hanging around with a dynamic, fun adult with a nice house and a fast car is a very powerful lure, a major ego booster.

6. Money & Gifts.
Predators shower their victims with gifts and money, which is very seductive to a kid who may not have much materially, and it also puts the boy in a place of "obligation" to the giver.

7. Physical affection.
Predators can sense kids who have little affection at home, which is something every boy or teen needs, and he slowly begins giving that affection to the boy a little at a time, making him dependent on it, craving it to feel loved and liked and special.

8. Emotional support.
Predators go out of their way to listen to a boy, sympathize with his problems and offer help and advice as well as encouragement. This goes a long way with a kid who doesn't feel like he's worth much.

9. Sexual gratification.
Predators are experts on how to seduce, entice, arouse and sexually stimulate a boy or teen, and like it or not, it can become an addiction for the boy, especially if it's his first sexual experience. Mix that with needed affection, and soon the boy won't know the difference between sex and affection, love and arousal.

10. Time.
Time is the predator's most powerful tool. Unlike normal adults who have lives, jobs, children, families, hobbies, and other interests and obligations which all play important but somewhat equal parts in life, the predator has a job, a career, interests, hobbies, etc., only as props to support his addiction kids. Since this is his allconsuming addiction, money, time and interests are all expended toward this one goal  to find his fantasy child or teen and molest them, photograph them, use them. Since the other things like work and family are just asides, they have enormous amounts of time and energy to devote to the finding of kids, the luring of kids, the prepping of kids, for the seemingly endless amount of time spent listening to kids and going places with them and buying them things and doing things with them, all in hopes of the ultimate sex with a minor.

The Project
Once a predator determines to find a victim, this is the general train of events that often follows:

1.  He Finds the desired child or teen.

2. Befriends them, gains their trust.

3. Gains the trust of the parents so they won't suspect.

4. Makes the boy feel important through lots of time and personal attention, makes him feel he is more important to him than anybody.

5. Flatters him. Tells him he's handsome, smart, etc.

6. Makes plans for private time with him,
     a. Counseling him,
     b. Going to movies,
     c. Going to the park, video arcade, beach, pool, concerts, etc.,
     d. Plans a camping trip with him,
     e. Hires him to work around the house or business,
     f. Helps him with his schoolwork.

7. Treats him like an adult.

8. Builds nonthreatening affectionate physical contact.

9. Introduces or allows  "adult" activities; smoking, drinking, drugs, pornography, swearing, etc.

10. Starts slowly discussing sex, gaining as much intimate knowledge of him as possible.

11. Remolds his thinking about what is "normal sex", eventually disclosing his "normal" desires for sex with the boy.

12. Having changed his thinking, gained his trust and dependency and accelerated physical contact, the boy is now totally vulnerable to being molested.

13. The predator plans the time and place where there will be no suspicion or interference or time constraints.

14. After prepping him with alcohol, pornography, etc., while he has broken down the walls enough to start molesting him, he tells him:
     It's normal,
     All guys do it,
     He knows some of his friends who do it,
     He loves him,
     The boy is "turned on" and that's normal and means he wants it too,
     Guilt is wrong,
     He's the greatest kid in the world.

15. After he's molested him, he makes the boy feel he started it, threatens to tell if he has to, tells him he will  be destroyed if the boy tells whatever it takes to keep him quiet.

16. After he has outgrown his attraction for him, the predator keeps the photos or videos as a memento and searches for a new kid.

This is a general picture that doesn't fit every victim or every predator, but fits many of them, and in that respect it is very painfully accurate. Knowing your enemy is half the battle in stopping him.

 

When Teenage Boys Have Been Sexually Abused
Sexual abusers are men or older teenagers who are sexually attracted to young boys. They are often in positions of trust like camp counsellors, teachers and ministers. They are frequently married, and may be father or stepfather to some of the boys they are abusing. They are attracted to young teenage boys for the same reason they are attracted to younger children. They are sexually turned on by youth and by the fact that they can exercise power over their victims.

Sexual abusers who are mainly attracted to older teenage boys are attracted not just for the sex, but also because they need to have admirers.
They try to impress their younger victims with how intelligent or talented or rich they are. They may want to be guides or mentors to their victims, and even help them begin a career.
People commonly believe that teenage boys should be able to look after themselves sexually, and if they’re sexually abused, it’s probably their own fault. In fact, many older teenage males are sexually abused by older men through no fault of their own.


When Boys Have Been Sexually Abused
Men who molest boys do it because they want to use their sexual power against someone smaller and weaker. They are sexual bullies.

What do we know about people who sexually abuse children?
• Abusers don’t want to get caught, because if they do they might have to go to jail. For this reason, they try to get you to keep the abuse a secret.
• Abusers may threaten you to make you keep the secret. They may tell you that you or your family may be hurt or killed if you tell. When this happens you feel trapped.
• Abusers may try to bribe you with gifts or special privileges to try to get you to go along with the sexual abuse.
• Abusers may look for other children to abuse. Some men who
abuse children do it over and over again and don’t want to stop.
• Abusers like to make their victims think it was their fault. This
way they have power over you. If you have been sexually abused, you get some of your power back when you learn that the abuse wasn’t your fault.

When Teenage Girls Have Been Sexually Abused
Sexual abuse is an abuse of power. If someone has forced, pressured, or tricked you into sexual activity, that’s sexual abuse. When a person takes advantage of you by giving you drugs and/or alcohol in exchange for sexually touching you or when older and more experienced people make teenagers feel they’re not “cool” or sophisticated if they don’t have sex, that’s a form of sexual abuse.

When Girls Have Been Sexually Abused
Most abusers are men and teenage boys but abusers can be women and teenage girls too. Sometimes boys and girls your own age are the ones who sexually abuse.
An abuser can be someone you may live with, like a dad or a brother. Or it can be a cousin or an aunt. Abusers can be people who are supposed to take care of you and protect you, like teachers, coaches, baby-sitters and doctors. Abusers are sometimes strangers but usually they’re people you already know...


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